No Good Deed

I try to be good, I really do. I think we should help our fellow people, homeless, haunted, tired, ravaged, depressed, hurt, scarred…I’ve been there. I’ve been emotionally abused, physically abused, homeless, hungry. I’ve done things I’m not proud of and have some scars to prove it.
One thing I can say, so far, is that I’ve never done drugs or been addicted, but some days… It’s been a rough couple of days/weeks/months/years, and I keep telling myself that it will be all right, it will blow over, but each day that passes, it gets harder and harder to believe. It gets more and more difficult to continue trying and failing, picking up the pieces and trying again. I trust very few people in my life, but I want to give, I want to make sure nobody has to take the path that I’ve taken. I want to make sure I don’t ever go there again.

Today, I donated a dollar toward an organization I believe can help with saving the world. It doesn’t matter the organization, as long as it’s something. That’s my opinion, you don’t have to agree. I know, a dollar isn’t much, I wish I could give more. I often tell people when I’m a millionaire, I’m going to do more nice stuff for people because if it wasn’t for nice things people have done for me, I probably would be dead. I get criticized a lot for what I attempt to do, whether donating “just” a dollar, which is close to all I have some days, to wanting to help people with homeless signs. Heck, I’m only one person. Some days I think about that too…what effect can one person have on the world…and then I think about a lot of “one person(s)” who did something, and in doing something, made the world a better place. I’ve been criticized for trying to make people smile, for donating too much, for not donating enough. At this point, I’m taking a stand.

I say, “I don’t care.” I will do what I can, when I can, and for as long as I can. It was never between me and those who have criticize me, and it never will be. I will carry on, continue trying to make my little corner a little brighter. I will reach out no matter how “weird” it makes me. I will continue trying, no matter how “hopeless” or “stupid” it is to continue. I will learn, I will take my hits where I get them and I will be better in the end, because if nothing else, I will have learned.

What I want everyone reading this to do is be “just” one person. Keep trying, keep going, and say “I don’t care,” when someone calls you or your dreams stupid or hopeless. I want you to learn what you can from the criticism, decide what is right and what is wrong, donate, give, love, learn and never say “I can’t” just because someone else told you that you cannot. Remember, “no good deed” may “go unpunished”, but that doesn’t mean we stop doing it, because, in the words of Mother Theresa:

“For you see, in the end, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.”

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